Expectations

As we all get “older” most of us realize that we spend way too much time trying to “be a certain something” or reach a “certain goal, post, destination” only to get there and find out it is not all it was cracked up to be. Too late we realize that sometimes it’s more important to just enjoy the journey than concentrate on the destination, the end point.


We put far more expectations on the goals that we had set for our selves, or in most cases the goals that society had dictated for us, that we break ourselves in the effort to fulfill those expectations. Expectations which are build up over a lifetime of experiences operate in the present. Having great expectations and ambitions always sound good, however when these expectations are unfulfilled, we groan, we moan, we become disillusioned and more often than not, we go out hunting for victims on who’s shoulders we can place the blame for our unfulfilled expectations.


Each person carries a broken dream or a shattered expectation. Some had their eyes on a certain career and for one reason or other the door to that career was closed, where as some got their hearts broken by the very people they had loved beyond another, or trusted greatest.

However as Guy Finley says, ‘Blaming others for the pain we feel each time someone fails to live up to our expectations is no different than burning our tongue on coffee that's too hot to swallow, and then calling our cup an idiot!’



So perhaps it time for us to relax on those expectations. expectations that we has placed on our own selves and on others ....... may be it will simplify things and allow us to lead a life where we face fewer dissapointments (lets face it, we will have many other things to frustrate us even if we take this out of the equation)..... who knws... perhaps it will lighten the burden that we carry each day!


"As I know more of mankind I expect less of them, and am ready now to call a man a good man, upon easier terms than I was formerly" Samuel Johnson

What if we want more than just friendship?

I believe every one of us had gone through the stage where we had fallen in love with one of the friends that we have in our circle, or (horrors!) the closest friend that we have (from the opposite sex!). And we all know how AGONIZING it is when this actually happens.

While there are always things we can do to try to move this friendship to the next level (the most profound of all advices will be given by ur best mates) - the scariest thing for all of us is that there is a very high chance of us ending up with nothing more than a wounded ego as a reward for this effort. To make matters worse, we can also loose the friendship as well….

Perhaps this is the reason why many of us remain “friends” with the people we love, constantly afraid that we may do or say something which may jeopardize even this relationship that we have with the person.

unfortunately, we are left with the painful choice, do we tell that person of our feelings and risk loosing that comfortable relationship that we are in, and keep getting hurt for the effort? Just hang in there and wait for this friend of ours to wake up one fine day and realize that he/she had been in love with us all along? (This when we think of it realistically may not happen… well, may not happen for such a number of cases. The lucky few who had been successful are an exception here. ). To chase them around and get more and more bogged down in our own head and emotions?

Or do we Cut our losses now, and end the friendship ourselves? Because the question here is, can we continue such a friendship? Can we bear to continue with a person who we no longer consider as a friend??? For who our perspective and feelings had totally changed? Can we continue lying???

TREADING ON DREAMS

HAD I the heavens’ embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

- yeats

The Flaw In Every Women

Every one says that their woman is flawed. We are true, yet we also have strengths too… but somehow in the list of complaints these strengths get mentioned less and less every passing day…. Either its lack of understanding, or lacks wit.

But surely shouldn’t she be given a medal for sticking it out with their guy through thick and thin? So here is for all those ladies who are there for their loved ones day in and day out….

A story from the heart!

By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his sixth day of working overtime.
An angel appeared and said, 'Why are you spending so much time on this one?'And the Lord answered, 'Have you seen my spread sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart - and she will do everything with only two hands.'

The angel was astounded at the requirements. 'Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish.'

'But I won't, ' the Lord protested. 'I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days.'

The angel moved closer and touched the woman. 'But you have made her so soft, Lord.'

'She is soft,' the Lord agreed, 'but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish.'

'Will she be able to think?', asked the angel.

The Lord replied, 'Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate.'

The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.'Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one.'

'That's not a leak,' the Lord corrected, 'that's a tear!'

'What's the tear for?' the angel asked.

The Lord said, 'The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride.'
The angel was impressed.

'You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing.'

And she is! Women have strengths that amaze most. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They don't take 'no' for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run, call, message or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning. They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends. Women have vital things to say and everything to give

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE TINY FLAW IN WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
so lets remember it sometimes too......

We are simply wired differently……….

Now this is a topic that is very close to my heart, uncomfortably close if u would like to know, “Why the hell is the love of my oh so wonderful life so difficult to understand???”(C me tearing my hair...)

Did any of u ladies (pardon, men also included here) ever wonder from which part of which planet, which area of the darkest region of the universe, our partners came from? Because it certainly does not feel like we even belong to the same solarsystem (so what, i am not a believer in the Mars and Venus theory, we must have sprung even furthur).

We ladies say our partners are careless, uncaring, not listening, not being warm enough, not being compassionate, not loving enough… the list never seem to end (mind u i had revised and edited and used this list on a number of occasions for me to knwo this by heart, i can even recite it in sleep). Put the same question to the other partner and he will have his own never ending lists of complainats. He will say woman are totally without commonsense, can’t find a direct path to the toilet without the detour, have a tendency to talk too much or (heavenforbid when they are being punished, never at all), gives them a headache with all the pitchfork changes in the story before they can even reach the point of the conversation… their list seem even more endless… n there v thought we were perfect, right??)Where I am pretty sure that I am the one who makes the most sense in MOST situations, and he will inform me (ever so firmly) that he is the one who has the most sense….

So who is right? Me or him?

so now many years of research now says that we are SUPPOSED to be that way. (Amazing is it not?) After many many arguments starting with, "u are not caring enough... and ending with i am going home to my parents....", we all end up with the mind-blowing statement, its ok, we are supposed to be that way. It seems we are wired differently. this statement of differences become even harder to accept in the world where we had grown up simply assuming that both sexes are no different. (Except in the most obvious way that is) We are not the same…Imagine that!!

Now that leaves us with the exact same question, so how on earth are we supposed to solve the differences of openion? Do the females just shut up? or do the males simply plug their ears? Ans pls....